Death Cafe Framework

Death Cafe (Reincarnated!) Framework

Unlike grief support groups or counseling sessions, death cafes are focused on exchanging ideas and conversations that are not limited to the experience of grief or loss. It is a discussion group for a topic many people find distressing, designed to allow people a safe space to have meaningful talks about death. This is NOT a place to process grief. The participants within Death Cafe are NOT trained to help process grief, and the space is not designed to support that type of heavy emotional pain or experience. Sharing within Death Cafe is encouraged but with the purpose in mind to constructively activate conversation to help facilitate skill-building and support systems in carrying out the Advanced Directives and after-death wishes of those involved.

  1.  Guidelines & Creating a Welcoming Environment
    • We encourage everyone to speak freely.
    • Remember: this is not a place to process grief, but a space to have meaningful talks about death.
    • Each participant must be mindful of attention spans when speaking.
    • There are no hierarchies, so treat everyone equally.
    • Show respect to everyone while they are speaking, whether you agree with them or not.
    • Listen to one another in good faith. Avoid making assumptions.
    • Respect everyone’s views.
    • No opinions – “just the facts”.
    • We encourage fact-checking from credible sources.
  1.  Consent and Confidentiality
    • Ensure all participants consent to the guidelines of the Death Cafe.
    • We emphasize the importance of confidentiality and consent when sharing personal documents outside of the Death Cafe.
    • We will obtain recording consent from all participants. Should you prefer not to be recorded, please inform the host at once.
  1.  Access to Materials
    • All participants will have access to the Death Cafe materials, which are located in our Family ACP (Advanced Care Planning) folder on the shared Google Drive.
    • If any participant needs assistance retrieving this information or using the software, the hosts are available to provide support.
  1.  Sobriety Agreement
    • The Death Cafe is a sober zone.
    • We will refuse admission to anyone who comes to a Death Cafe intoxicated.
  1.  Personal Expectations
    • We encourage each participant to share their reasons for attending and what they hope to gain from the Death Cafe.
  1.  Advanced Directives
    • We acknowledge the importance of Advanced Directives and after-death instructions concerning who can perform specific tasks such as making medical decisions and enforcing the division of physical property to beneficiaries postmortem.
  1. Support Systems
    • We encourage conversation to help facilitate skill-building and support systems in carrying out the Advanced Directives of those involved.
  1. Resources
  • Share documents with specific needs, including emotional support, resources that can be counted on, etc.