Steps to initiate a connection:
- Check-in with yourself. Ask yourself if you’re in a positive state of mind and prepared to connect with someone else (the person you’re thinking about connecting with).
This can help you set a solid foundation for yourself to feel safe and prepared. - Check for any triggers and know your boundaries before going into the interaction.
This validates your ability to keep yourself safe and can help prevent any defenses from happening during the interaction. - Ask for Consent. Ask the person if they are okay to interact with you.
This honors the other person and their space – - Be transparent about your intentions. Set time frames and let the person know what you intend to do with the interaction.
This builds trust and establishes a goal for the conversation. This can change but it is best practice to be transparent and communicative about things changing if they do. Example:
These phrases can help facilitate open and respectful communication within the family.
Sharing Ideas
- “I have an idea I’d like to share with you.”
- “What do you think about this?”
- “Can we brainstorm together?”
- “I appreciate your input on this.”
- “Let’s discuss our thoughts on this topic.”
Discussing Triggers
- “I feel triggered when…”
- “This situation makes me uncomfortable because…”
- “Can we talk about what just happened?”
- “I need some time to process my feelings.”
- “It’s important for me to express how I feel about this.”
Setting Boundaries
- “I need to set a boundary around…”
- “I am not comfortable with…”
- “Please respect my need for space.”
- “I need to take a break from this conversation.”
- “Let’s agree on some ground rules.”